Looking back over the last eight months, I am stunned at how quickly it has flown by.
I have been writing with a pen and paper, quietly, privately, trying to understand my desire to write and the relevance of sharing.
It all seemed so narcissistic to think that anyone would be interested in my thoughts, my journey, and so I went silent.
This morning, sitting alone in my 'secret garden', I thought about a conversation I had this week with one of my "greats", he's only four. We had been talking about how much I enjoy my days with him and how happy he always makes me.
He asked, "Are you happy at home?"
I said, " I am. But I guess sometimes I get a little lonely."
He thought for a minute and asked, " What is lonely?"
I said, " It's how I feel when I am at home and there is no one around to talk to."
He said, " Like I feel when I'm in time out?"
Amazed at how quickly he had put it all together, I said, "I guess so."
Maybe that's why I decided to consider sharing again. We need that connection that allows us to be alone but not lonely.
I'm considering the possibility that my being here, living, loving, learning from four year olds, after losing the light of my life, might offer a whisper of hope to someone just beginning this journey.
Twenty years is some days, forever, and others...the blink of an eye.
There is a new decal on the rear window of my car, "I exist in two places. Here and where you are."
I like to imagine that Shannon has the same saying on hers.